When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.
Details to follow once I gather all my thoughts…I have not been writing that much lately probably because I’m still at a brink of shock of what has been happening..the heart doesnt stop from beating!
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I wake up in the morning But then you came around me Because I’ve never felt like this before |
malungkot pala mag-isa..i miss a lot of people..and i really hate it when im being senti..very not myself!……………………………………..la ko masabi!
i just hate the feeling!!!
why bleeding is breathing
ur hiding underneath the smoke in your room
why living is believing
i used to crawl in off the floor
…it’s been a while.ive had a hart time coping up with pressure at work kya didnt have time for self lately.atleast this time i could always browse the net whenever i want when at home.thanks to flo for the connection.
san na nga ba ko? parang di pa rin ganung nagsisink in sakin that im actually in cebu "earning"..bright lights in the big city.what a blessing noh.from the usual parasite to a struggling, working slave.i never thought of it to be this tough.sleep sa day, graveyard work- that’s typical in the call center business. .atleast i’m getting the hang of it now. after two months of nerve wrecking training medyo nakakabawi na rin sa pagkain.being in this totally strange place is exciting and fulfilling. however i still miss being a parasite. ang sarap kayang tumambay,spend time with ur loveones, magvideoke to the top of your lungs without worrying at all,etc etc etc! pero this time ive learned to be kuripot or else ill starve to death..in short, ive become a more responsible human being (i thought atleast)
…hay life..so full of love. i miss my A..the atmosphere at home,my extremely unique all girl family..masscom ppol especially the graduating class to whom i was suppose to share the tears of joy on the big day with.i miss the people of ndu- kasama na dun yung mga tambay na walang magawa sa buhay kundi tumambay syempre..and my berks.gastric people watch out for my homecoming..who else did i miss?well, definitely not thods.how could i miss that bastard eh he’s been with me at the best time i need him.sad nga lang bcoz ill be missing him real hard soon.uuwi na sya sa real commander nya that’s why..and what we’re you guys thinking huh? sa ermat nya syempre.ill truly miss having an all around friend here in cebu.para akong mapuputulan ng kamay. la na ko cook, dishwasher, alarm clock, playmate, handyman, and everything else. ill truly miss going home at 6am with someone waiting for me like my pet dog hehe.
life will never be the same here compared at home..but as the saying goes, life is what you make it!
…had spent the two weeks off school really really productive..mind if i make kwento? cant help but share or else puputok ang dibdib ko sa sobrang saya hehe.i still havent thanked some few good people i spent the holidays with. 3rd yr mc? infairness, sarap ng pagtanggap sakin ha.i was quite hesitant at first to take the ride on the way to davao with them.i’m way too old for their crap, i thought..but what the heck, being with these youthful hyperactive pips was indeed a great experience i’d truly treasure all through out life.i don’t like the "ate" thing though.it gives me the feeling that im really old na kc..but somehow i’ve realized along the way that being looked up as elder brought me sense of responsibility(lesson #1)..it feels good when you share a piece of ur thoughts and experiences with a bunch of eager teens..and i could even pass as their ka-berks hahaha!
…lesson # 2 was acquired during the mcw leadership for young women leaders of mindanao.one needs to be aware of what is truly happening in the society to be able to take part in the making of a better place to live..world peace ika nga hehe.seriously, i was so touched by many stories about the sufferings of our indigenous brothers and sisters in various parts of the island. the government really sucks, now im sure about that!i used to think kc that most people would blame the admin for nonsense and that they would exaggerate things when infact nasa sarili naman natin ang problema..well, i stand to be corrected.the world is a chaos but i believe there is hope still.
…lesson #3- love is what u make it.what do i mean by that?i’d prefer not to elaborate hehe.good news is i’ve finally found the formula to be in control of the good stuffs i have in my life right now..so so into love=)
…another learning, when ur down and troubled and u need a helping hand, u need not to call, just look around and good people will come ur way.dami pang pasikot noh..actually, what i meant by that..im so thankful flo and my cousin amier made the sembreak really free from trouble.super happy po ako i was able to spend quality time with them and meet some of their good buddies.nagkita rin pla kami ng long time friend tara ko..atlast.
..when i came home from the trip, super bawi naman ako sa missed time with my family.up to now nagbobonding pa rin kami ni A.oh how i missed her..some people are just too lucky to have a blessed life.im glad i am!
la magawa..im on my 4th day of fasting. it’s a friday and there’s nothing much to do kaya kakayamot mag-antay ng oras..atleast nagkaron ako ng time magnet..i went to the library this morning to prepare for a reporting na dapat sana ngayong hapon ipepresent.bihira po sakin ang maghanda kaya nakakatuwa dahil wala kaming pasok harhar..life’s full of jokes!!!
…1st day of fasting.kinda mahirap sya on my part bcoz for the past days naging hobby ko ata ang kumain from time to time.kapag la mapuntahan kakain..yet di naman tumataba.
i was in davao last week and really had time to relax by spending quality moments with my "thoughts".on our way home, we passed by a sight where a vehicular accident just happened.tragic talaga, as in!di ko natagalan yung namataan ko sa scene.halos mawasak ang ulo ng victim.it made me realize how in a glimpse our lives can be taken away from us. magkahalong sadness and fear ang nag-envelope sakin at that moment..ang daming "what if’s" na alam kong di ko kakayanin pag nagkataon.
The Almighty God really has a unique way of making us value our lives more..it sank into my thoughts that he made me actually see that tragic incident to give importance to the things i have carelessly neglected.di natin alam kung kelan yung time na kukunin nya tayo so we must make every day in this world worth while.more importantly, there is no way we could surpass all trials if we dont look up unto Him.
As for me, im determined to play my part as an Islam believer this holy month and on to the days ahead but i just dont know how that is..masyado pa kasing maraming tukso sa paligid.ang hirap nun puro plans but in its real sense di ko dinidibdib. i know ill get the answer to that soon..im on my way to finding out as a start, so wish me luck!
i have figured a new formula that could help me get rid of stress..and it’s really working.dapat lang pala i should accomplish one thing at a time. school’s no longer that dreadful hehe.it feels good to receive appreciation from mentors and peers spite all the kapalpakan.
at home, i was surprised to learn that my kid’s in to a lot of development lately.dapat siguro i should find some quality time with her regardless of how loaded i am with paper works.at 3, marunong na syang magsulat and often times nagsiscribble sya even in front of the tv..and she knows a lot of songs.her favorite? the pinoy big brother theme..ang kulit! A’s really a blessing to me. everyday, she gives me surprises that brings joy to my heart. her sweetness is incomparable!
thods, my best buddy for all times,never gets tired of my unpredictability. siguro naiintindihan nya lang yung nature ng pinagagawa ko sa buhay..i can never be happier with someone else!
i miss my old time friends.yung high school peers,mga nasa davao and mga cool people in MANILA.pano ko kaya i-gather lahat yun? who knows?!
……..another bc saturday! just finished my graphics class, salamat!medyo nakaka-drain ng utak pero dami kong na-absorb.atleast konti na lang aasikasuhan next week. we’re through with mc newsletter problem.ready for release na next week.nagconduct na rin ng audition for the upcoming variety show ng org, so all i have to worry about is the production..as if ganun kadali hehe.i’m quite getting the hang of being in-charge of a lot of things and that is because magagaling din yung mga taong nakapaligid sa’kin, thank God!eto na naman..inaako ko na naman yung credit eh organization nga.hahay ay-la.
i look forward to airing a good program tomorrow. i know wiway and i can make it..mamaya nang konti have to deal with actidamean na naman.hay naku!kelan kaya ako magkakaron ng tahimik na araw. that’s what i get from too much confidence (too much responsibilities tuloy!) konting tiis pa makakaraos ka na rin. 7 months is not that far anyway..
i miss my old time friends. it has really been a while that we haven’t seen each other.san na kaya sila?back in high-school pantay-pantay lang kami, whether may utak man o kakarampot. But look at some of them now..may attorney, businessman, nurse, at kung anu-ano pa..at syempre ang pinaka-confident…si yatok. student pa rin and very much struggling para maka-graduate na atlast this march. atleast I have my "A"…and Thods..diploma na lang talaga hehe. see you when I get there!
…dami ko naaccomplish today kahit may asungot na gumugulo sa isip ko..buti na lang tough girl ako!kakabadtrip..enweiz, kanina na yun.kinda ok na rin ako atleast i feel good because i was able to beat deadlines.tomorrow’s another bc day.sana hindi na mainit ang panahon para di rin umandar init ng ulo!
nice girl po ako today..that’s because i dont have to worry bout anything at all..yesterday was a really fine day.surprisingly, wiway and i came up with a good program spite the fact that we didnt make any preparation at all.o dba nice=)pero di na talaga ko uulit ng ganun.what if i it doesnt turn out well,eh di palpak din grades namin..i wouldnt put my reputation in danger ever again.nakakahiya rin kasi sa partner ko incase i fail to make arrangements..di na muli magiging irresponsible.cant promise but ill do my best na talaga..im just so blessed!yun lang..thod’s reading my notes right now.stop na ko.baka kasi mabore sa pinagsasabi ko hehe.cge pa-cute tong seatmate ko dito.k lang..handsome naman daw sya sabi nya..gotta end here!pikon na kasi!
